5 min read

How to be socially attractive AF for guys (no bs guide)

How to be socially attractive AF for guys (no bs guide)

Become irresistibly magnetic 


Socialization is a lost art. 

Sadly, chronic scrolling and videographed escapism has maxxed out our isolation. 

But really…

We were always designed to interact with our fellow humans. 

Imagine being able to make friends anywhere. 

Whether it’s in your local coffee shop or 5,000 miles away from home —  

Social attraction is a skill ANYONE can learn. 

Here’s how…

# 1 | READING ROOMS

The first step in becoming a social genius is situational awareness. 

Why?

Simply put…

The rules of interaction change depending on your environment.

For instance:

Let’s say you want to strike up a convo with that mysterious new girl who has a Deschanel vibe. 

Situation A : Completely empty hotel bar

Leave a seat in between, don’t pull up right next to them. 

Situation B : Best friend’s house warming

Seat yourself close on the couch, it’s all good. 

The lesson here? 

Be mindful of social norms. 

But remember…

People WANT to talk rather than scroll IG alone. 

So don’t feel like you’re “intruding” on their parade. 

# 2 | CONVO AURA 

It’s pretty common (especially for introverts) to overthink the process of starting a conversation. 

Really, this is all you have to know: 

“Hey, I like that necklace, what’s your name?” 

Compliment, and introduce yourself. 

Never fails. 

Here are some other icebreakers: 

  • Where are you from? 
  • What do you think about this? 
  • What brings you here? 
  • What do you like about…? 

Small talk gets the conversation started, but if you want to make a stronger first impression…

Don’t stay in “normal” mode. 

Spice it up by adding humor and lighthearted fun. 

Stand out from the “wonderful weather we’re having” crowd. 

It goes without saying…

Nonverbal communication is KEY. 

  • Firm handshake (slightly longer than you’re comfortable with)
  • Strong eye contact (not too serial killer, intermittent) 
  • Confident tone of voice — always 

The last one is important. 

Which one sounds better? 

“Oh, hhi there Jessica, I saw you from afar, and I was wondering you wanted, like, talk to me?”

Scrolled right past, right? 

So did Jessica. 

“Hey Jessica, take a look at this.”

Essentially…

Nonverbal + verbal communication = aura 

# 3 | COMPANY PICNIC 

This one didn’t occur to me until last week. 

If you’re still working on your social chops— this method is for you. 

Enter social situations with a peace offering

In other words…

Bring gifts. 

Let me explain.

I was recently at a hostel in Mexico, and found myself with a bowl of popcorn far beyond my limits of consumption. 

So…

I offered it to a group of people I didn’t know, and then I knew them.

No thinking required. 

# 4 | SOCIAL TRAINING  

Don’t forget. 

At the end of the day, being social is a learned skill and trained habit. 

So how do you develop these abilities? 

Talk to everyone, no matter the depth of the conversation. 

It can even be as simple as saying “hello” to the receptionist at your gym. 

Or waving to the gentlemen walking his dog in the evening. 

Why? 

You want to train your brain to override the “don’t talk to them” mechanism. 

Basically…

As you receive more positive feedback, you’ll take on greater challenges. 

And unconsciously — you’ll become a more sociable person. 

Test it out for 2 weeks.

It’s made a huge difference for me. 

# 5 | NO DUCKS

You might be thinking…

This is a lot to remember just to speak words.

Sure, and there is a more streamlined way. 

Stop giving AF. 

Remove the voice in your head telling you “NO.” 

Why? 

Your brain’s default setting is to avoid any level of discomfort. 

“No, they look busy, nevermind.” 
“No, this isn’t the perfect timing, I’ll wait.” 

And the source fear…

“No, I’ll get rejected.”

So identify the excuses your brain is giving you…

Then do it anyways. 

The worst case situation is not what you think.

Push past, great things are waiting on the otherside


Subscribe to help me herd sheep in Andalusia.

If you want to learn more about social attraction, check this out:

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