How to masterfully socialize with anyone

Lifelong social charisma… 

Have you ever wanted to be the most magnetic person in the room? 

Talk to strangers in hipster cafes? 

Ask out attractive women without breaking a sweat? 

I got you. 

Over the last few months, I’ve spent my after hours reading and applying straight wisdom from the best books on socialization. 

I wanted to understand why some men radiate confidence while others give scared puppy. 

Everything I learned comes down to 3 steps. 

Once you master all three — social success is guaranteed. 

Here’s how to start…

# 1 | mirrors  

Remember that one guy in “Office Space” who effortlessly asks out Jennifer Aniston after some hypnosis? 

This is even better. 

Enter “Psycho-Cybernetics.”

The essence of the book is Dr. Maltz discovering that people act on beliefs, not reality. 

A classic example: 

Timid men who got plastic surgery to “fix” their insecurities still remained shy AF. 

It changed nothing. 

Why? 

Appearance was never their restricting factor. 

It was self-image. 

If you BELIEVE that are you are a nervous person…

You act nervous. 

But the opposite is also true. 

If you know that you are confident and attractive…

You are that automatically. 

So the question is…

How do you permanently change your self-image?

There’s two steps: 

• Identifying your self-limiting beliefs
• Imagination training

Here were some of my self-imposed constraints: 

I can’t socialize or attract because…

1) “I’m an anxious guy” 

2) “I’m not good enough yet” 

These come from childhood and don’t reflect reality. 

So the first step is to recognize that limitations are bullsh*t.

They’re just a reflection of YOUR beliefs. 

Now…

Practice imagination training for 15 minutes a day. 

What’s that? 

It’s essentially first-person POV visualization. 

1. Sit down on the ground
2. Imagine going through your day as your ideal self 
3. Mentally socialize IN DETAIL with strangers or attractive women

The more specific your visualization (touch, colors, sounds) — the stronger the exercise. 

Dr. Maltz proved this to be nearly as effective as doing the real thing. 

In a nutshell…

• Frame for confidence 
• First person visualization 

Let’s move on to step 2…

# 2 | the art of confidence 

Confidence is simply the accumulation of repeated exposure. 

This is how worried travelers can go from nauseated passengers to professional rawdoggers. 

So to become a master socializer — practice the skills that take you there. 

It might take 1000 attempts. 

But repeat and you shall attain. 

You’ll also learn this quickly:

Socialization is a skill. 

Which means it can be broken down into principles. 

Here’s a headstart: 

How to Make Great Conversation With Anyone

No more dry convos…

medium.com

With repetition, socialization becomes automatic. 

Like working a keyboard. 

Sidebar — most men struggle with delayed gratification. 

So use a habit tracker to positively reinforce your behavior. 

It could be something like: 

1) “Say hello everyday” 

2) “Start a conversation everyday” 

3) “Ask someone out for drinks everyday” 

Increase the difficulty as your confidence rises.

Most importantly, see yourself as a man who simply has fun with it. 

No more boring homebody type sh*t.  

# 3 | climate change 

Imagine if the movie “Limitless” started in rural Alabama.

Guarantee that Bradley Cooper moves to NYC by intermission. 

Why?

Certain environments let you reach your goals faster. 

Writing is easier with a pencil than tree bark.

Dating in Barcelona is easier than Inuvik. 

Basically…

Move to a location where you have the ability to practice. 

No more excuses — take it up a notch for your future self. 

The right environment can spark a revolution. 

Let’s go.