Oct 19, 2024 4 min read

The Mindset of Highly Attractive Men

Be magnetic…

What makes certain men attractive while others struggle?

Contrary to popular belief…

It’s NOT a stable job or homeownership.

Why?

It’s not 1970s dating anymore.

Online dating has shifted the culture.

And a certain energy is required for success.

No stress.

Here’s the top qualities of highly attractive men…

# 1 | they lift

One thing desirable men don’t do —

Sit around and complain.

They act.

For men, the most effective way to boost your stats is the hit the gym.

It’s lowkey a cheat code.

Personally, I’ve made strides after updating my physique.

All it takes is consistent training.

Here are the essentials:

Lift 3–4x/week
Optimal protein intake
Progressive overload

For beginners, this is what I might do:

Day 1: Biceps, shoulders, legs

Rest 48 hours

Day 2: Chest, triceps, back

REPEAT

This works your major muscles while allowing for adequate recovery.

Just make sure you’re chowing down enough protein (about 0.9–1.0g per pound).

Over time, slowly increase the weight, repetitions, or intensity of your lifts.

This is the mother of progress.

Once you’ve obtained the gym mindset…

80% of the hard work is done.

# 2 | they self-care

For men, there’s two non-negotiable forms of hygiene.

Skincare
Grooming

Let’s start with skincare.

Despite what Phil from marketing tries to sell you…

There’s no one-size-fits-all.

But there is a framework I can share.

After years of tragic skin, here’s what’s worked for me:

Mild cleanser
Active
Moisturizer / SPF 30 mineral sunscreen

A high-quality sunscreen is mandatory if you don’t want to age on 3x.

Ultimately, keep everything simple.

Overloading on chemicals can actually ruin your glow up.

Also…

External appearance reflects your internal health.

So here are the lifestyle habits for glass skin:

Avoid processed, sugary, and fried foods
Post-gym cold shower
Brisk walk outside

Eating clean is self-explanatory.

Cold showers prevent your skin from drying out.

And cardio decreases cortisol, reducing breakouts.

For grooming —

Your hair and beard needs to be on point.

Before you give Dumbledore, hit your barber for a fresh cut.

Here’s what I recommend for most guys:

Short haircut with fade styling
Grow out your beard to a medium length

This style elongates your face, which is widely considered to be attractive.

Think Chris Hemsworth.

Check this out for more styling inspo: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/311100286757133341/

# 3 | they dress up

Sorry bro.

It’s time to toss out those Naruto hoodies.

If you want to think like an attractive man…

Dress like one.

It’s more than just presentation.

Style influences your behavior.

For example —

I guarantee you’d be more confident in a luxury suit than a wrinkly band tee.

So here’s the new dress code:

Solid color tees for casual days
Button ups for date nights
Layer with a bomber or suit jacket
Pants or chinos (no shorts)
Clean brown or white shoes

Mix and match to your preference.

Don’t forget to add edge with accessories…

Watches, bracelets, necklaces, etc.

For bonus points: get your favorite threads tailored to perfection.

# 4 | they challenge fears

Let’s switch gears now.

Consider this:

What’s the best way to spend 1 hour a day?

Breaking news…

It’s not creeping on your crush’s finsta.

Instead, spend an hour a day doing things you hate the most.

Talking to strangers, digital detox, deep work…

An attractive mindset is one that breaks out of the comfort zone.

It sounds simple…

But the easiest way to do this is by understanding that you are a talented, relaxed, and fun person.

See the world through this frame, and life becomes a Bob Ross painting.

# 5 | they go outside

Want to expressway into the 10% club?

Stop scrolling.

Most Americans spend the equivalent of 2 months a year on their phones.

With zero upside.

So how do you cure your phone addiction?

Change your associations.

Taking a note from “Atomic Habits” by James Clear —

Make it invisible, unattractive, difficult, and unsatisfying.

For example:

I defeated a ten year Reddit dependency after…

Deleting the app and blocking the website
Realizing it was an echo chamber of negativity
Not wearing my phone in the house
Greyscaling my phone for 30 days

It sounds intense, but so is wasting your time.

Now…

Since you have nothing else to do — go outside.

Practice social attraction with each interaction.

This is my best article on the topic:

But here’s a speedrun:

Eye contact
Listening
Open body language
Low and slow voice

Remember — it’s fun.

Apply this while improving your physical, and your mindset automatically becomes attractive.